I met my brother for Chinese buffet this afternoon and now it's late and the MSG is keeping me at this infernal machine. I got to the place early to give me a chance to eat some salad before he arrived. Otherwise, I'm eating salad and he's diving in to fried rice and our buffet procedure is out of whack. Anyway, while I'm sitting there one of the guys in the next booth decided to blow his nose just as I was digging into some egg foo yung. It was a quick sniff blow but a prolonged evacuation of all this sinuses as well as the sinuses of half the restaurant. It sounded like the opening scene of the witches in Macbeth. The contents of his nose bubbled and roiled. It was Mount St. Helena just before the big blow. It sounded like a huge pot of oatmeal. It put me off my moo goo gai pan.What is wrong with some people?

I couldn't help thinking of the joke I heard when I was about 8 years old. It involved a barrel with a dead Chinese guy and a soda straw in each nose poking through a hole in the top. I don't remember the joke but it was disgusting.

Speaking of jokes, I am putting a link here to one of the most disgusting and perverted jokes you will ever hear. If you ever want to be the same again you won't listen to it because it is rank beyond perverted belief. I should tell you that when I was watching it the first time, I was laughing so hard I had to pause because I was losing my breath and was seriously afraid I would have a stroke...or at the least black out, collapse and do a William Holden. You have been warned. I am serious. It is horrible and just thinking about it makes me want to shower. If you are a parent and ever want to look your children in the eye again, don't follow the link.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tw10xa_xtNg&feature=related

American Idol is very good this year and a couple of the songs the guys sang on Tuesday were beyond belief. So good. Vantage Point is a good movie. The Metropolitan Opera rocks. Winter sucks.

Rob